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Meal plan for October 27th – November 2nd

Can we all talk about the 48 pound elephant in the room?

Thanks all for the thoughtful and civil comments yesterday about my post related to the morning Facebook shit storm.  I’d love to collectively answer some questions/comments that came up a lot.

1) Did you take Jack to the party, and did he have cake?

Answer: You bet your ass I did.  He went, behaved very well, and had a tiny sliver of cake.

2) Does Jack have ADHD (or any variation of implying it)?

Answer:  This is something we have been monitoring since he turned three, and every ped/expert we have spoken to says he absolutely does not have it.  They say that any medication they’d prescribed wouldn’t “cure what ails him”.

3) How are you holding up?  Don’t let those people get you down.  Don’t change how you post.

Answer (to don’t let those people get you down): my sister sent me a text asking if I was ok and letting me know not to be upset by the comments.  Here was my response: “I am seriously ok.  Only I have the power to let people make me feel shitty, and I reuse to let that happen”.

Answer (to how are you holding up?): Just fine!  By having a blog, I choose to put myself in the “public” eye.  It is a decision I have made, and some days the big girl panties are a little more uncomfortable than others, but always my skin thickens.  Also, when people choose to get low, nothing makes me laugh harder or better says “go fuck yourself” than refusing to sink to their level.  Truly I feel that civility is the biggest way to demonstrate that your behavior doesn’t mean you get to get me down.

Answer (to don’t change how you post): I absolutely won’t.  I’ve been an over-sharer from the time I could talk, and I don’t intend to change that because some people spent the morning forgetting what it is like to have civil discourse and treat people like a human being.  I am who I am, and the negative doesn’t get to win.

A few of my good friends texted me today saying they were pissed at many of the comments, etc.  I simply said “eh, don’t worry about it.  And it’s a great thing that so many people are perfect parents and never have their own issues”.  I’m looking forward to some new parenting books being written…

4) Have you talked with a doctor, counselor, etc.?

Answer: yes.  In fact Jack had a ped appointment early yesterday morning, and I asked for referrals to an occupational therapist and they also gave me one for a behavioral counselor.  I really want to give Jack the chance to prove his own idea (the FOCUS chart for his desk) has a chance of working.  If his reports are good next week, I’ll be happy, and if they’re decent moving forward, I’ll be thrilled.  But, if they’re not, I’m more than happy to look at external resources.

Let’s say next Saturday we start talking about politics, gun control, spanking, and religion, ok?  Seems like it would be less controversial than not letting your kid have dessert for two weeks!

Let’s move on and get back to what this blog is about, ok?  Fart jokes, frugality, and food!

I seriously have the decorating bug right now.  I can’t stop planning and visualizing what our space is going to look like at the end of this remodel.   To actually have ownership of something and get to turn it from beige, white, and tan to something fun and bright is so exciting to me!!!!  My friends have described my “decorating” style as “post Hoarders.  You know, how after everything is cleared out…”, and that is something I absolutely own.  Clutter is not my friend, so you will not see “after” shots of rooms of our house with pretty vases, and do dads.  Just ain’t gonna happen.  Not only do those things collect dust, but anything in our house must withstand the constant onslaught of Nerf attacks.

Every day I find something and send it to Troy, and I get a “surrrrreeeee…?” in response.  Not so helpful that one.

This week I became the proud owner of (at least) $150 Dansko boots, for the huge price of free.  Someone I work with purchased brand new Danskos on Craigslist, only to find out they didn’t fit her.  She didn’t feel like reselling them, and being something with giant feet, I was gifted some boots.  She won’t let me pay her for them, so I delivered the first of many dozens of eggs to her on Thursday.

They’re not exactly my style, and something I would never purchase myself, but the price tag (free), combined with the extreme comfort I felt when putting them on, was pretty fabulous!

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Earlier this week, Troy’s back was sore, so I squirreled away downstairs to surprise him with a DIY backwarmer.  Troy has a huge broad back, so I needed to make this big as well.  We didn’t have any cheap rice, so this sucker is stuffed with lentils, and three kinds of dried beans.  If the zombies attack tomorrow, we’re cutting this thing open in a few months.  Tiny Roku remote there for size comparison.

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A funny thing happens when you make a giant backwarmer…it ends up not fitting in the microwave!  We have to put this on a cookiesheet in the oven at 200 degrees for 10 minutes.  It’s so nice and warm though, and I foresee using it for snuggling when it’s cold out this winter.

With the change in weather, I’ve found that I love having a hot drink in the car with me on the way to work each morning.  I get one fancy coffee stand drink per week, and have since the dawn of time.  I always get it on Wednesday, which is double stamp day, and bring my own mug for $.25 off the drink.  It’s part of my routine (and budget), and something I look forward to all week.  My current drink of choice is a “Chai Nog”, which is a spicy chai tea latte made with egg nog. It is exactly how it sounds – amazing and pure fat in a cup.  The local coffee stand I go to uses Smith Brothers Farms products, so the “nog” is essentially locally made, and oh so delicious!

But, for every other morning, I make my own tea “latte”.  I’ve been drinking Republic of Tea’s chocolate peppermint tea for awhile now, and recently ran out.  When purchasing more, I found this beauty, and you bet your ass I bought it.  And it’s delicious!!

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Hot red velvet cupcake tea, with about 1/4 cup of creamy raw milk, and a teaspoon of raw local honey, almost makes my commute enjoyable.  ALMOST.

Our power went out last night thanks to a giant windstorm, so the lad took a long time to fall asleep. Don’t fear anyone (who already questions my parenting); those are battery operated candles.  Costco for the win!  Those things on his fingers are raver lights from Amazon that are always fun to play with, but especially useful during windstorms.  I purchased these for the kids at Jack’s preschool last Valentines day, and they were a huge hit with everyone.  And yes, my kid sleeps in the buff.

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Jack was pretty nervous about how dark it was, so I ended up bunking with him last night.  Here is a live shot of blog writing, with one very passed out boy.

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Are you ready to talk about a meal plan?  Let’s get to it!

Monday:: Beef stew, salad, and biscuits.  No, we don’t love this so much that we keep having it, it just keeps not getting made!!!!  We were supposed to have it Saturday, but things got shifted around last week, and that’s when we ended up having popcorn dinner.

Tuesday:: Troy’s fabulous hamburgers, grilled zucchini (the farm where I buy our milk still has fresh zukes for sale!), and chipotle sweet potato fries.

Wednesday:: Homemade Rubens, salad, and skillet spuds.  So fun to use the potatoes from the garden that I grew this past spring!

Thursday:: Breakfast dinner was so simple last week, and we’re repeating it again this week.

Friday:: Homemade pizza (and salad) before we set out on our candy hunt.  Jack is still deciding whether to donate his extras to the Candy Fairy, or a local dentist who buys back candy.

Saturday:: Popcorn and movie night!

Sunday:: Family dinner at my parent’s.  We’ll contribute a side, dessert, or appetizer per usual.

We have been getting the best organic red grapes from an independent fruit stand lately.  They’re super expensive, but a delicious treat for Jack’s lunch all week.  I paid $7 for some more this week, and I’m sad to say they’re TERRIBLE.  Ugh, what a waste!  I spent $24.91 at our local butcher for breakfast sausage, hamburger, and stew meat (I bought a lean cut of beef, and they nicely chopped it up for me), $3.50 at our local farm for raw milk, and $27.10 at the grocery store.  We’re hitting up Costco before my parents, and need a few items that will probably end up around $50 ish.

What are you having this week?

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25 comments on “Meal plan for October 27th – November 2nd”

  1. I’ve been thinking about you and I know what you are going through because I raised 2 out of 3 WILD boys. I am also a first grade teacher and have been teaching elementary school for 20 years. It is developmentally appropriate for little boys to move and touch and talk and laugh. It is not so developmentally appropriate for a teacher’s lack of classroom management to become your problem. She probably means well, but probably not the best “fit” for an active little boy. If you would mind my suggestion I say to take it day by day. You need to shape appropriate behavior. Good days-do something special like play nerf gun war or walk around the block collecting stuff little boys like to collect. Not so good days, don’t do the fun stuff. Try to talk about what he did do right, emphasizing the positive. I would not punish him for a month. You are trying to model and mold good behavior for the little guy. A fourth grade reading level is absolutely amazing and his love for learning should be the highlight of his first year in school. I can share with you that those bad stories will be the best memories of your life. On a positive note, my little stinkers are very successful (Geologist, Computer Engineer, and freshman at college planning on becoming a Chemical Engineer) I was a wild and zany parent, still am, just like you and they LOVE me dearly and they turned out just fine! HUGS to you!

    • Thanks for your ideas and experience Tammy. We are currently taking it day by day, and two of three days this week have been great. Phew!

      I am also currently researching the concept of “fidgets” to see if it will help my tactile boy.

      I can’t believe you survived multiple boys!

  2. Sorry you had to deal with haters. I didn’t even read their stuff, but it sounds like it was bad. They don’t come with manuals, so we all do our best. Your honesty and “real-ness” keep me going. Love the boots, btw! I am OCD about boots.

    • The manual comment made me giggle. In those first few months, Troy and I would shout “check the instruction book” when we couldn’t figure out what to do!

  3. Hi just wanted to say I’ve enjoyed your blog a lot. The directness and honesty is very uplifting. And as I’ve reached the ripe old age of 59 (OMG) I would rather have had the guts to say bullshit to a lot of the crap I didn’t in my younger and oh so dumber days. That said opinions are like assholes….everybody has one. Life
    lesson come to us each and everyday
    and as a parent of a young and
    energetic boy you have a wonderful
    and trying time ahead of you. Love
    and laughter have been a great
    comfort to me…..I’m so glad my
    wonderful son and two extremely
    different beautiful daughters are now
    grown. I can now laugh at all the
    mistakes my husband and I made. It’s
    like a minefield when you are dealing
    with that young mind. I wonder about
    it sometimes……but they are all normal
    well adjusted people with unique
    personalities. Love and laughter always got us thru. Keep up the good
    work young Jack is a lucky guy.

  4. hi there! i’ve followed you on facebook for sometime but the minute i saw fart jokes i was like OK I”M IN!! i signed up for your newsletter here.

    btw- the DIY Warmer link has an extra http:// at the end so the link isn’t working.

    thank you for all the wonderful information you share.

  5. Not sure about your taste in music, but Taylor Swift’s “Shake it Off” comes to mind for the Facebook Shit Storm. I love your attitude about dealing with people and I think the Shake it Off can apply to not beating yourself up too much, too.

    “I’m dancing on my own, make the moves up as I go” is what we ALL do when we are parenting. I did a lot wrong and a whole more lot right with my three (I call them The Big Kid age 33, The Little Kid age 25 & The Girl age 29…I NEVER use the right name when talking to them, hence the nicknames). You’ve got this, chickie!

    ps. I have a confession….now when I hear the term “Jacked Up”, I picture a little blond ninja with a Nerf gun grinning from ear to ear 🙂

    • You’re so funny, and very timely. Our sermon at church on Sunday was based on how Taylor Swifts shake it off is similar to Martin Luther’s Reformation movement. Pretty funny, right?

      You are correct in picturing a blonde ninja! He’s probably naked too, just an FYI.

  6. The grapes just don’t seem to be as good this year, at least the ones I’ve bought. Have to make do with what’s at the store, one bag I bought was wonderful and the other was mostly just tasteless. I love green grapes kept in the fridge in hot weather and it was really disappointing!

    One final word on Mr. Jack–I’m watching your travels and travails to help my daughter with her middle son. Having had a brother and son just like him, but without the resources other than drugs which didn’t really work, I’m hoping to help her with another little boy like that. He’s in kindergarten too, so we shall see how it goes. Her time is taken up with a new baby who is a micro-preemie right now and we live here in WA, so all I can do is watch and suggest things. You get to be my guinea pig!!

  7. HAng in there girl. I have a grand daughter that could be Jack.
    Just because someone can read something on the internet doesn’t mean that they have a brain in there head. there are know it alls every where!!!

  8. Wow, I couldn’t believe the tactless and aggressive comments I read after your posts over the last few days. I felt awful for you all weekend.

    This parenting shit is so hard. You are trying and thinking and striving to have your little one be the best he can be and he is so lucky to have a mum who is so thoughtful, considered and loving.

    Kate

  9. Heyyy!

    I never knew you had a FB, and I follow you now, only because I would have ages ago, not because I wanted to read those comments, which I couldn’t cause then I would probably get all wound up and defensive. Jack is a smart, happy kid and you work hard to make life good for him. I’m sorry you had to go through that.

    I know you have had lots of advice, but the one idea that popped into my head was maybe pretend play that you’re in the classroom at home. Set up situations that he has difficulty with and talk about the choices we should make when we are in those situations. Mom or dad plays teacher and then the other could play student role and model making a bad choice and then Jack can help them make the good choice.

    My little guy (2nd grade) is in the habit of excessive talking and distracting others (he got that from me, I was in trouble a lot in school) and sometimes not finishing his work because he would rather be talking about Pokemon with his classmate.

    • By the way, love the fabric you used for the back warmer. I wondered: how did you keep the lentils/beans back while your sewed up the seam after filling it? I made corn hole bags a while back and it was such a pain in the ass trying to avoid getting the kernels under my presser foot/caught in the needle. Pins?

      And that tea looks so yummy. I need to try it!

  10. You are one patient mother! I applaud you! I am a special education teacher and have studied behavior modification. My (maybe unsolicited) advice would be to figure out WHY he is acting out in school (peer attention, teacher attention?), and then teach him a socially responsible behavior to achieve the same goal. Reward him for following the new behavior and you will see success in no time!! Good luck!

    • Thanks for the ideas. It’s not just a school thing; it is how he is. He never intends to act out with malice, but he just can’t help himself from touching others.

      I’m researching fidgets right now, and another teacher emailed me an idea of a weighted vest when he is moving from activity to activity. The extra weight can help kids focus on their movements.

  11. Whats the line – long time listener first time caller? how you’re handling this convinced me you’re the coolest chick ever. : ) sorry no valuable advice to add just sharin’

  12. So I was in Target yesterday and I ran across this awesome journal. If I wasn’t so cheap I would have bought it, but then it would have just sat on my shelf.
    http://knockknockstuff.com/product/im-a-parent-guided-journal/

    Dansko shoes are worth every penny (and even more awesome when free!). I had a pair of Dansko sandals I bought while I was in cosmetology school (which I dropped out of- cue the music from Greece). I wore those sandals every day for hours a day and my feet were never happier.

  13. I didn’t read the whole back log of story but I will say that my daughter is currently grounded from desserts/candy for two weeks. I won’t even say why because it doesn’t matter. I would have chosen a different punishment had I realized Halloween fell right in the middle. So we let her know Halloween was there and asked if she had any ideas. Her choices came down to take her punishment as is. Meaning no candy on Halloween (we did agree to save it for her) or to have off from punishment for Halloween but in return she would have to add a week to her punishment. She chose to add a week.

    As another note my aunt is a kindergarten teacher and swears by once the morning bell rings to start class she takes all the kids on a one mile walk. She says it energizes the lazy ones and the hyper ones it tires them out a bit so they can focus. She has my hyper can’t sit still or stop talking son in her class. She does this and he has done wonderful with it.

    • I have copied your IP address, and have alerted CPS about the horrible parenting you are doing. No dessert for two weeks? What kind of monster are you?!?! =D

      Sadly, I don’t believe his current teacher is much about movement. ;-(

  14. Sarah,

    I am a School Psychologist and my heart went out to you when I read this.
    Remember, you know Jack better than any educator, test, or physician does. You are one of the good ones and shouldn’t be hard on yourself, fo’ real!!! You, Troy, and Jack will get through this. Take deep breaths, enjoy the good days, and always remember Jack’s pure heart and innocence, those two attributes will help the bad days not seem so bad. I will keep you in mind when I get/come across resources, but you seem very well educated and I think patience is the ticket at this time.
    Take good care!!

    • Thanks so much! We’re exploring the options of fidgets right now, and weighted lap bags and maybe a weighted vest (to wear when moving from one activity to another), because what I’m reading says it helps tactile kiddos.

  15. Sarah, I admire your Candor. I’m sending you a cyber hug just because I want to. I had a Jack and he is now 21 and the love of my life. He’s taught me so much and in time they develop into these wonderful beings. He’s an amazing kid just like you. Thanks for sharing your life with us. I look forward to your blog. B~

  16. Long-time reader, first-time commenter.
    So frustrating for you to have to go through all the negative comments on FB and here to try to find the good suggestions. I am not yet a mother (have worked at a couple orphanages long-term and am a nanny, so very familiar with active boys, but haven’t had to solely take care of them 24/7), so I don’t have any real advice to give. Just wanted to share a link I read today that made me think of you and Jack. http://theartofsimpletravel.net/toiletries-first-aid-essential-oils/ Down near the bottom of the post in the section on essential oils, the author talks about her sensory processing disorder child and what she uses that really calms him down. Not sure if that would be helpful to your family and situation, but thought I’d mention it anyway, in case you’re interested.
    All the best as your continue to find ways to help Jack flourish in kindergarten!