Scattered Sundays

If you’ve never witnessed someone running while screaming “get off Poo Poo Sandwiches” while kicking at attacking chickens like John Wick, well, you’ve never been my neighbor. Consider yourself lucky.

Last week I was at my computer and heard some excessive noise coming from the chicken coop. I looked out the window and saw that multiple chickens were attacking our (and perhaps the world’s) oldest chicken, Poo Poo Sandwiches.

How old is this bird? Well, she was named when Jack was 4 and he’s now 13. So that many years old. Many chickens live 3-5 years, but I think the evil coursing through Poo Poo Sandwiches’ veins has allowed her to live a lot longer. She is indeed Satan’s chicken.

But, chickens are pack animals and when they sense weakness in their pack, they attack. A weak member of the pack puts them all at risk.

The term “the pecking order” came from actual chickens. Never mind that my chickens live in the lap of luxury getting fresh bedding and popcorn.

Their tiny evolutionary brains tell them to eliminate weakness, and Poo Poo Sandwiches was determined to be a weakness. Even with me actively kicking the birds launching themselves at her, they were relentless.

I got her safely out of the chicken’s yard and sprayed her head with some antiseptic that is dyed purple because chickens go bananas at the sight of blood. I repurposed one of our DIY garden trellises to build her an impromptu trauma center.

The trashy-looking coop got even jankier the next day when it started pouring and I had to clip plastic to the top of the chicken hospice to keep her dry.

We kept her in there for a few days and then finally just let her roam free in the yard where she has spent most of her days under a giant Japanese maple ala chicken fort.

A few years ago “we” combined two of the nesting boxes and sectioned one side of them with chicken wire to make an isolated section within the coop. This is where Poo Poo Sandwiches has spent her nights – safe from roaming trash pandas, and her evil feathered sisters.

Hopefully, we’ll introduce her back to the flock this week, and fingers crossed, all will go well. I need to get her a tiny helmet and some chain mail.

A friend of mine (and the blog) is launching an ambitious goal of hosting the first ever Pride fest in their town. If you’d like to support them, you can do so by shopping their Amazon wishlist or donating directly through Venmo.

Last week I was out on a walk and got an idea in my brain that wouldn’t leave even after 4 miles. I came home, decided to go for it, and with a few clicks of the mouse, I embarked on a whole new business adventure. It’s 50% scary and 50% potentially exciting. And no, it’s not an MLM.

I’ll be rolling it out over the next few months, and hope to launch it before Fall. It’s related to the blogging space and I aim to prove a theory that Katie, Cassie, and I have had for a few years now.

Good news! We found out earlier in the week that Jack made our local premier soccer team. He had been playing for the team on an interim basis from Nov 2021-April 2022. All the players and new interested players had to try out over a two-day period last week.

The team had been considered select but is upgrading to premier for the 2022-2023 season. I assume this means more travel. There are already three tournaments scheduled for summer so far. Pray for me.

Who got a new computer this week and feels ancient? Like trying to teach my mom how to use dial-up internet back in 1996 ancient. Oy.

After months and months of my laptop shutting down, taking forever to process anything, I finally had enough. I was restarting it almost daily trying to get it to work. The final straw came last week when it took a whopping two hours for it to “wake up” and load Chrome.

Having a working computer is kind of important when running your own ONLINE business, so I threw in the towel and did something I have avoided and dreaded for a solid decade. I bought a Mac. And now I have never felt stupider in my life.

I’ve been a PC girl my entire computing life and relearning a whole new system is not fun. What is fun is the google search history on my phone. I try to figure out how to do something and then end up googling six different things as I try to figure out where/what the steps are to solve the initial problem.

I truly miss the ease of my PC and certain aspects of it that I never realized how often I used. Simply having that little desktop toggle button at the bottom of the screen was lovely, and I never realized how often I loved having a clock constantly showing on a locked toolbar.

Oh, and I don’t want to tell you how many times I have tried to use this new laptop as a touchscreen, only to remember that for some dumb reason, Mac laptops aren’t touchscreen. What’s up with that? Even my janky 2015 HP was a touchscreen.

I also realized quickly that Mac does not play well with ANY of my existing external tech like my Bluetooth mouse and external keyboard. I couldn’t even copy and paste using keyboard commands because the dang keyboards are different.

It appears my old laptop was about 15 inches and the new one is 13. I literally could not see anything while editing photos and it was becoming an ergonomic nightmare. Troy asked why I didn’t just get the bigger one and I explained that the price difference was a whopping $700. Hard pass!

I ordered an external monitor from Costco (the business expenses are rapidly adding up at this point…) only to find that now my desk is too shallow. The new monitor was so dang big that I felt like my eyes were going to fall out from exhaustion. I also felt like I was (poorly) running NASA command.

Thankfully I found that there was an “eye saver function” you could toggle on for the new monitor (why isn’t that the default…?) and that helped a lot.

The switchover from PC to Mac was a real rude awakening when it came to editing photos. I realized that colors look totally different and I’m not even sure what to do with that going forward.

I have an iPhone and I can tell you that photos looked the same on my PC and phone. So shouldn’t they look the same on two Apple products?!

So, I need you all to help me out if I start publishing photos where everything is orange but it’s supposed to be green. Or that kind of thing. Like “um, Sarah, that air fryer orange chicken now looks like it is covered in slime. You might want to look into that”.

Also, I’m going to say this and then be done whining…Google sheets suck and are completely inferior to OG Excel. Come for me, nerds.

In the Garden This Week

We fiiiiiiiinally got some sunshine this week! The lettuce seemed to triple in size overnight, and we harvested our first batch of delightful green gem and some red lettuce that I can’t remember the name of. So tender. Such a PITA to wash.

Other than that, we’re just holding steady at the moment. It’s still not warm enough to plant tomatoes, cucumbers, or green beans. I see people with gardens on my walking route, and I’ve been watching them pull their ruined tomato plants out. All while looking super sad.

I never plant the summer crops until there are 7 days on the calendar with 7 days in a row (no cheating!) with the low temps that are 50F or above. I’m basically like Hodor from Game of Thrones Right now. Everyone else is rushing to get stuff in the ground and I’m just holding steady. I have ONE job. And that’s to wait.

ON SUSTAINABLE COOKS THIS WEEK

Air Fryer Shrimp Tacos – Make the best Air Fryer Shrimp Tacos with this easy and delicious recipe. A flavorful homemade lime coleslaw pairs well with the perfectly seasoned and tender shrimp. {Pin this recipe}

Trail Mix Bars – Fudgy Trail Mix Bars are an amazing no-bake treat. These oat-free granola bars are packed with lots of flavor and chocolate goodness, with no refined sugar. {Pin this recipe}

Lavender Simple Syrup – Learn how easy it is to make your own Lavender Simple Syrup for coffee, cocktails, tea, and lemonade. You’ll love the amazing flavor of lavender syrup in your drinks. {Pin this recipe}

What are you having this week?