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If you’re new around here, confessions is a time for us to all unburden ourselves of the silliness we’re feeling at the moment. I share dumb things, then you share dumb things, and we all have a better day because of it.

Let’s get started!

Confession 1

I want to find the child who got Jack interested in Pokemon again and I want them grounded for life. He’s been totally off Pokemon since third grade, and then all of a sudden, he started to care again. 

And now it is back to me having to listen to all the stats for Squirtle, blerck chirip, farky mcsnippy, and who the eff cares what their names are. GROUNDED FOR LIFE.

Confession 2

Have you ever heard the term “nice cream” used as a cutesy name for vegan ice cream? I seriously do not understand the name. The ICE part of the term “ice cream” is not the part that someone who doesn’t consume dairy would have an issue with. It’s THE CREAM. 🙂

And yes, the alliteration of “nice” and “cream” makes it sound pleasant. I get that. But have we ever stopped to actually think about the term that seems to have taken Pinterest by storm?

I’m not knocking vegan ice cream by any means. I ate a bunch of it when I was dairy-free while nursing my oldest, AND I have an incredible homemade version (related: Chocolate Vegan Ice Cream). But c’mon. Let’s get call things by names that make sense.

Confession 3

Hearing any song by the band Sublime on the radio offends me. Their music is CRAP.

Confession 4

Bennett has been into Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles lately, and something from the theme song has me stumped. You know the “turtles in a half-shell” part of the song?

WHAT TURTLES ARE IN FULL SHELLS???? These are the things that keep me awake at night. I can name one of the wrinkles on my forehead “random things to worry about”.

Confession 5

I’ve found that I sleep better with some noise, and lately, that means listening to a podcast. I listen to it with one earbud in and it’s quiet enough to where I can hear the kids but also helps dull the sound of Troy snoring.

I’m using the generic Apple earbuds with the cord and they’re a giant PITA. I wish I could get just one air pod. I think Apple could market it as either an “iSnore” or “Snorepod”.

And yes, I actually do have some great Bluetooth earbuds, but they still have a cord and I’m worried the batteries will die and I can’t use them for my walks in the morning.

Confession 6

Nothing annoys me more than being in a public bathroom where the main door pulls IN and they only have hand dryers instead of paper towels. Do you know how absolutely disgusting those door handles are? How are bathrooms able to be approved through zoning if they don’t open OUT? At least give me that little kickstand thingy I can use to open the door with my toe.

Confession 7

There is a very nice young cashier at a place where we shop at frequently. She is easily 15 years younger than me but still calls me “hon”. I mean, don’t call me ma’am, but “hon” or “honey”? No!

 

Ok, friends, your turn! What do you need to confess?

About Sarah

Helping you serve up budget-friendly sustainable recipes with a side of balanced living.
Come for the food. Stay for the snark.

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28 Comments

  1. I’m a teacher so the Pokemon, whatever card of the next phase are collecting in my bottom drawer. The rule is if you put them on the counter before class time, you can get them back after class. However if you are caught playing with them, I keep them until Friday.
    I am feeling a little sorry for the kids who were waiting for their cards before Covid19dom came along. Hopefully I rescued their Moms from Pokemon induced conversations for this time.
    Hand air dryers are yuck.
    Handles you have to touch are yuck.
    Touch pads for Credit/debit cards are yuck.
    Why in the middle of Covid19 are people suddenly aware of this?
    Didn’t your Mom tell you to wash your hands? and show you the right way to do so?
    My biggest confession are those negative Nellies griping because there was no plan in place for this never-before-seen mess. We are all trying. I even feel politicians are trying to stop this. The people I see complaining the most are posting pictures on social media of their family trip to the dollar store, the public park (that is closed) and complaining they cannot go sit down in their favorite restaurant so they take a sad selfie in front of the door with all their hands on the door handle…..
    Social distancing is not a joke. Go home and keep your stupid self there until further notice.
    rant over

    1. My mom had the BEST “confiscated” drawer in her classroom! She kept some things until the end of the year if the kids were repeat offenders.

      I think “keep your stupid self there until further notice” should be the official title of the stay at home campaign!!!

  2. Ugh! The bathroom thing. Yesterday I used a bathroom with two doors to entry. If you were exiting the bathroom, the first one you encounter would be the one that you pull, the second was the one that opened out or pushed. What was the sense in any of that? Additionally, I saw or rather skimmed, an article (it’s best not too look or read too deeply into this stuff if you want to have any hope of sleeping at night) that said those air dryers are the worst- that they just blow around bacteria. I declined to read further into it but suffice it to say that I am forever scarred.

    I feel like you may have touched on a variation of this in one of your other confessions but this next statement will likely not be a popular one. I, personally, would rather endure a child crying instead of hearing whatever he/she is watching at full volume on an ipad or his parent’s phone, especially in a closed location like a waiting room or a crowded airplane. At least the child crying is organic. The usually repetitive video or game that the child is playing is not and it is the height or inconsideration.

    1. Ha, I would have stopped reading that report too! NO thanks.

      Oh yeah, those repetitive “beeps and boops” of games make me stabby.